Who I am

I’m telling you I am not Superwoman. Welcome to the blog. Assalamualaikum ●▽●

M.A.R.A.H.

I’m a bad temper girl. Easily mad at people. But until now, I’m tried to manage my temper so it will not blow it out to people around me. Whenever I’m angry with anything, I’m bearing it on my mind “please don’t acting like a stupid clown. Act like a professional”. With the anger inside of me, I choose to keep silent. NO mood in talk, NO mood in texting, NO mood to laugh, NO mood in movies. Just don’t mind me. Let the fire turn off by the times. I admit I’m easily got angry with little things such as waiting for a-late-person (even it is just 5 minutes late), or someone just format my pendrive without me knowing it, but I’ve tried to not make it a bigger issue.  Sabar itu separuh daripada iman, right?? That quotes I was thinking when I’m in temper. Don’t worry; I’m not a harmful people.

Warning; when I’m in silent mood, please don’t disturb me with anything that annoying me much. The fire might be bigger than the earlier. What is the annoying thing? The words that can make me pissed off. If it was a joke, make sure the joke is making a sense and not a sarcasm-to-be.

J.E.A.L.O.U.S.

I’m bad at this thing. And I totally hate this feeling. Wishing for “won’t be silly jelly” but the more I denied it, the more it shows.  I’m totally got easily jealousy when I’m got nothing when they have it. The more suck is, if I realised that when I’m nothing to them, their faces show “huh, look at yourself, LOSER!” . Ok. It makes me more to cursing. That I’m looking ‘loser’ to you, huh???!!!   Sometimes I cried louder if there’s something that I cannot hold with but the others can.  Sometimes I get angry if there’s something that I want but the others got it. Sometimes I get piss off if there’s something that I’m failed but the others success. All that things happened because of jealous. It’s totally broken my heart.

E.G.O.

Everyone have their own ego.  The difference is just, how their managed to handle the ego with the situation, the times, the people, the emotion. Me, have a high ego (I know because this is me). Sincerely, I’m admitting that I’m an egoist person. Just a bad or good, I’m not realized it at all. Depend on how you judge me and my egoist. I’m not easily giving people a chance to look down at me. But somehow depend on the situation. If there people that close to me or barely have I known (relative, classmate, or others--call-as-mate), I’m will forgive them on face to face. But still hold the grudge inside of me. I’m never forgive them. Beside of forgiveness, the way I’m act whenever they hurt my ego which is, I’m never talk to them, never looking their face, and never smile to them. My heart was hurt enough to do the happiest thing to them. It is still called as ego or pendendam..???

---- I will not showing the good of me because all of you might saying that I’m “RIAK”.--------

Nobody is perfect. Even the superman/woman. What they do is helping others but for themselves?? hopeless. Nobody there for them. Yet, I'm not a Superwoman, that stronger outside but feeling hopeless inside.Let me show you how the dark side of me. So that I can see how you all, the people can accept me the way I am. If you accept me the way I am, I will do the same things to you. If you cannot accept me, just leave. But never regret it. All above might change your first impression to me as a bad girl.  I'm a person who got the feel of anger, jealous and ego; same as you are. And me, still trying to be the best of friends ever. 

Who knows, all above I've just saying but not mean it. Me is who am I, and You have to accept it!

K.A.W.A.N

Hello hello. Welcome to the blog. Assalamualaikum ●▽●

Nak dijadikan cerita, baru semalam aku bukak facebook aq tu. Erm..since when eh aku dah x bukak FB tu? Agak lama jugak la. Cume semalam was the shock news aq baru dapat. Which is….

MY EX-SCHOOLMATE DAH ADA ANAK!!!

Nikah nye bila aq pom tatau weh. Usha-usha album photo dye pom, tak nampak pulak satu gambar nikah dye pom. Alih-alih post kat FB and say  ‘My *****’ (***** is her son’s name).  tgok dari komen-komen dye pom dah agak pasti she’s become a mother already. Dulu aq nmpak jugak dye post gambar pegang baby. But time tu engt tu anak sedara dye ker. Sebab dye ade abang-abang atas dye.

Tanye kawan aq yg lain, dah tau ke yg SHE dah ade anak. Memasing jawab “YA!” Time tu aq wat muka. Pe nih….semua orang dah tahu tapi aq sorang tak tahu ni pemende ni pemende niiii… *ayat tak puas atie*

Maybe she wasn’t remembered me at all. Ye la, almost 5 years tak contact tak menyapa, the end of SPM baru nk add FB dye.  Mahu nye dye tak engt kat aq. Tapi aq engat je kat dia :’(

She’s my friend since darjah 5. Funny girl, baik atie, chubby chubby pipi dye gitu, and the most manjeww girl i knew. Tu masa jamang skola rendah  punye crite la. Haha Di kala aq tengah sesedih, dia lah yg menceriakan hari aq. Dengan lawak bodoh nye, ayat sempoi dye, how adorable *bagi aq la*. Sayang dye sangat-sangat.

Paling terharu sekali, bila aq gaduh dengan geng ni and dah tak kawan dah, tapi senyap-senyap dye datang dekat aq and say

 “ Walau apa pom diorang kata macam-macam kat kau, tapi aq still nak kawan dengan kau. Aq tau, kau bukan lah macam yang diorang cakapkan”  erm....memang terharu :’)

Even kitorang kawan senyap-senyap dibelakang GENG tu, i’m appreciate much much the friendship tu. Aq tak kesah pom tak de kawan. Prinsip aq satu je

“AKU AKAN KAWAN DENGAN SIAPA NAK KAWAN DENGAN AKU JER”.

Bila jamuan librarian (aq & dia librarian dulu oke) , konon pergi asing-asing. Dah masuk library tu, kemain nk duduk sebelah aq. Haha Dalam banyak-banyak hari aq menjalani rutin kehidupan aq selepas dah tak kawan dengan GENG tu, time party librarian  was a big smile ever I’ve made. Sumpah tak tipu. Now i can see which can called a real friend than the fake one. Lepas party tu, all the glow surrounding me become gloomy as i take my step out of the library. Then the fake cool me begin.

Haila kawan. Banyak kerenah. The person yang jadi BATU API antara aq dengan GENG tu pom dah mengaku bersalah, and apologise to me. Bagus la. Aq pom dah maafkan dye. AND the weird things is, antara aq dengan BATU API tu, still contact each other, seeing each other, dah macam bestfriend dah. Haha pelik tak? Rasa marah tu ade, tapi tu la. Tak terluah. haha Tak pe tak pe. Aq kan kawan dengan sape nk kawan dengan aq jer. Every person that make friend with me officially declare as my BESTFRIEND! Kalau diorang-diorang ni tak reti nk menghargai aq then stab back me, itu hak diorang. Sakit tu sakit, tapi biar la Allah tolong revenge bagi aq. J

Keep smile. Everythings happends must be a reason. Therefore, should learn from the mistakes to being a better person.

Sorry eh awok. curi-curi gambar anak awok. Mohon jgn putuskan tangan saye :') 

btw Dhani ni comel. bambam. hehehe May Allah bless you and yours happy family.

NOVEMBER ALREADY ~ : )

Happy Deepavali day.  Welcome to the blog.  Assalamualaikum ●▽●

Meskipun Raya Deepavali Pertama dah pom berlalu semalam, tapi aq tak kira! Nak WISH gak utk raya ke-2 ni! Hoho Barulah nampak cam warga 1Malaysia. *uhuukk uhukkk* Ermm..actually agak kekok gak nk mulakan mukadimah blog hari ni. Sekarang  pun tengah mencari idea untuk menggunakan ayat yg seeeeeeeesuai untuk ditaipkan :p (ayat skema)

Firstly, Harap maklum, result Uitm dah pom kuar hari Jumaat lepas; 01 november 2013. Sebenarnye malam hari Khamis lagi aq dah tengok result. Muahahaha cuak nye pasal, dan sebab si Mas la duk peringatkan aq sal result dah masuk dlm emel. Pastu ngengada nk suh aq tolg bukak kan utk dye sbb dye x leh bukak result dye through hp. Tak pepasal alang2 check utk dye, dengan emel-emel aq skali aq bukak nk tgok result gak.haha Berdebar ugak…but after all, Alhamdulillah. Suke la tgok result aq. Eventhough tak la dapat sampai A+ for practical tu. But still, bersyukur. Hehehe yg sengalnye, cgpa x naik byk mane sgt.  :/

Ok. Done nak bercerita sal result tu. Dah basi dah semua tu. Kalau dah dpt result, means that, MY PRACTICAL LIFE IS OFFICIALLY END!! Muahaha Lepas ni nk tag pepe x leh dah la pakai ayat “Practical’s life” “PracticalSem5” bagai tuh. STOP oke STOP. Praktikal memang dah habis. Ni nak sambung cite dia lepas habis praktikal ni. Kije yg aq tgh wat skrg bukannye keje sebarang keje. Tak mcm korang okeh.. duk bangun – tidur – atas – katil – turun – katil – pergi – mandi – pakai – baju – pergi – dapur – Makan! Makan! Makan! – tgok – tibi – goyang – kaki – naik – katil – tidur tu OH NO NO NO!! *kemain aq buat ayat berantai kat ats tu. Hahahahaha* So, nk bagitau korang, aq ade buat part-time job. Dan aq skrg kerja dekattttt……TEMPAT AQ PRAKTIKAL NI!!! Hahaha JENG JENG JENG. *Sorry, Terlebih reaksi lak =,= * Alhamdulillah..dapat la gaji cikit. Boleh la cover duit sewa umah sem depan.

OH YAAA!!! SEM 6! Semester last for diploma aq which is start on 25 NOVEMBER 2013.  Hehehe DAN untuk sem depan, aq duk luar kampus. Huhuhu Memang dari sem 4 lagi dok berpakat dengan yg lain, nk duk luar. Konon nk hidup berdikari *KONONNNN* la kan. Haha Tup-tup even aq apply kolej pom….haprak lak kerani kolej ni, kedekut nk bgi some of  senior QS stay dlm hostel. So, x de rezeki la budak QS part6 siswi nk stay kat kolej Indera Mulia tu, termasuk la aq. Tapi ade aq kesah..??? dapat kolej pom aq still nk duk luar.hagaga saje nk huru harakan sistem kolej. Kalau x dapat ade aq kesah. Kalau dapat pom lantak ah. Haha

*Sila jangan terkejut dengan perangai gengster tepi jalan macam kat atas. :p *

Ahhh..lega rasanya dapat update balik blog kesayangan sheershangat ni. Huhu maaf la x de cerita menarik. Sekarang aq lebih pemalu orang nya nak bercerita lelebih sal hidup aq * malu-malu tutup muka*. Ye lah, sebab sekarang ni bila aq tulis sekian sekian sekian, ade pulak orang tu duk sakat.  Terlalu jujur kang, kena sakat. Terlalu emosional kang, kena sakat gak. Hahahaha So, me typing cerita yg reringkas ye uollsss :-D

Cegitu je la earlier weeks of November aq. We’ll see the next week lak, cemana rupa hidup aq. Haha ade mase aq menaip lagi. Takde masa, aq akan ADAKAN masa tu jgak. PROMISEEEE!!! Kejadian SEPTEMBER takkan berulang lagi. NO MORE NO MORE J

Stay cool and relakssss. Saya nk pergi nonton wayang HIGHLAND TOWER. Tapi kat Kelantan x de wayanggg. Ermm..noted that. *redha, tgok on9 je la.*

Better for me to Selfcam. Cam si dia :)

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